A rookie police officer was assigned to ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner. A call came over the car’s radio telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.
The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner. The rookie rolled down his window and said, “Let’s get off the corner.”
No one moved, so he barked again, “Let’s get off the corner!”
Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled glances in his direction.
Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, “Well, how did I do?”
“Pretty good,” replied the veteran, “especially since this was a bus stop.”
Once there was a boy whose parents named him Odd. Other children used to tease him about his name. As he grew up, people continued to make fun of his name, calling him ‘oddball’ and all sorts of other names. “What an odd name you have!” they would joke. Finally, as an old man, he wrote out his last wishes. “I’ve been the butt of jokes all my life,” he said. “I’ll not have people making fun of me after I’m gone.” He instructed that his tombstone not bear his name. After his death, people walking past would notice the large blank stone and say, “That’s odd.”
Bible Jokes
Q. How long did Cain hate his brother?
A. As long as he was Abel.
Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.
Q: Where is medicine first mentioned in the Bible?
A: When God gave Moses two tablets.
Q. Who was the smartest man in the Bible.
A. Abraham. He knew a Lot.
Q. Why was everyone unemployed in the Bible?
A. There was only one Job.
Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible? Samson, he brought the house down.
Q. Why was Moses the most wicked man in the Bible?
A. Because he broke all Ten Commandments at once.
Q. Why was Job always cold in bed?
A. Because he had miserable comforters.
Q. What kind of lights did Noah have on the Ark?
A. Flood lights.
Q. Why did Noah have to punish and discipline the chickens on the Ark?
A. Because they were using “fowl” language.
Q. When was meat first mentioned in the Bible?
A. When Noah took Ham into the ark.
Q. How do you make Holy Water?
A. Get regular water and boil the devil out of it.
Q. At what time of the day was Adam created?
A. Just a little before Eve.
Q. Why did God create man before woman?
A. Because He didn’t want any advice on how to do it.